Finally the Final

I took my final exam yesterday. There were 100 questions. I had to guess on a few of them but otherwise, I felt good about it.

After the final exam my clinical group went to eat lunch together. We had a good time. I am surely going to miss being together with them as a group. We will be put into new clinical groups each semester. It sucks because we clicked well. Not too much drama or friction, etc.

After lunch we headed back to the campus for our final evaluations with our clinical instructor. This is a long form we have to rate ourselves on 48 points. We write in examples of how we have met the criteria. The scale is "S" for satisfactory or "NI" for needs improvement and "US" for unsatisfactory. I got two "NI's" and the rest were "S's." The instructor has told us that she will never give all "S's." So, long story longer, I passed clinicals with flying colors. We gave our instructors a big basket of candy for a thanks for being such great instructors gift.

Afterwards, we all lingered in the parking lot saying our goodbyes. Then I came home and tried to go ahead and start studying for the calculations class that starts at the the end of May. I couldn't do it. I couldn't study anymore.

I logged onto my campus account and the final exam grades were posted. I made a 91. Wow, I am really proud of myself for that. I figured it all up and I ended up with an 87 overall. That is great. Yeah me!!! If I hadn't gotten so sick during this semester I could've made an A. But I am happy with my B.

Happy, Happy, Joy, Joy

Throughout our nursing program, each nursing class has a group project with your clinical group of eight. So, this class we had a Caring Project. This is the Dean's baby and she tells us about it and gives us all the criteria for it. Then she is the one we turn it into and she grades it. She changes it a little each semester. This time she made it all about caring for ourselves. She said that nurses are usually people who put themselves last and we need to know the importance of caring for us. I agree. But, this was hard to do. She shot down about four ideas and then we got one approved.

We are all females in our group so we did "Caring Girly Get-Togethers." These are times we have set up to last throughout the two years of school. We get together at each of our houses and have a time to just relax and pamper each other. We'll be having one each semester. The first one was fun and I look forward to doing it again.

Part of the project is to write a 7 paragraph paper. These are the points we were graded on and the grades we made:

Creativity and sustainability of act (15 points) We made 20/15
The dean wrote: "Creative and caring w/potential for excellent plan for sustainability throughout the program."

Development of a caring relationship that makes a difference (20 points) We made 20/20
Dean wrote: "Appears that most members have formed a bond & recognizes plus' already."

Teamwork (20 points) We made 18/20
Dean wrote: "Worked well together & demonstrated some insight into group process. However, did not make recommendations for preventing future communication breakdowns. Also, did not discuss the impact of not having a formal leader."

Ability to express ideas clearly (5 points) We made 5/5

Evidence of critical thinking (30 points) We made 30/30
Dean wrote: "Demonstrated critical thinking in final paragraph (summary of caring) and lessons learned."

Grammar/Spelling (5 points) We made 5/5

APA Format (5 points) We made 4/5
We did an "annotated" bibliography. She wrote APA uses "Reference" not annotated.

So our grand total for points....

We made: 97 / 100

In telling us all about the caring project the dean pointed out that the average grade is usually in the 60's. So, we were all nervous about what we would make. Wow!!!!!!!!! I am so proud of us. We hit it out of the ballpark!!!!

I will be so sorry to be broken up out of this clinical group. Each semester we are re-grouped into new clinical groups. I can't imagine I'll ever be in a better group. I wish we could stay together throughout our time in the program.

Wasting Time

I am really wasting alot of time here. Lord knows there are so many things I should be doing. I just can't seem to make myself do them. I just want to play on the computer all day. Or veg out and watch TV. I feel like I am done with this semester. But I'm not. I still have my final exam Monday. So, why am I feeling so unmotivated to do any studying???

I was home all morning this morning. I did not crack a book. I did not clean anything. I did not do anything worth while. Well, I did meet my clinical instructor and my clinical group at a good restaraunt for lunch. We had a great time. Then I went over to my in-laws to visit and pick up the kiddos. From there I took girlie to her softball practice. Then back home where I played on the computer some more. Made hot dogs and fries for supper...very nutritious.

Every time I head in here to study, I veer off to the computer and play games or read blogs. I may need to get out of the house in order to study tomorrow. This is really ridiculous.

I Hate Laundry!!!

I have been married for 12 years. I have two children, 4 and 8. I love my family but I HATE housework. Hate is not even a strong enough word for how much I dislike it. The two things I hate the most are laundry and kitchen duty. When I married my husband he was 26 and still living at home with his Mom and Dad. His Mom has always and will always do ALL household chores. So he grew up with her cooking, cleaning, laundry, EVERYTHING. So, he expects me to do all that too. And I like an idiot took on the role. Now after all these years I am so sick and tired of it that I am ready to scream. I am so resentful towards him about this.

I have tried to talk with him about it. I have asked nicely. I have screamed and acted like a total bitch about it. Nothing works. He will occasionally do laundry. His laundry. He will sometimes unload and load the dishwasher. I think I wouldn't be as resentful if he would take care of the outside of the house. But, he doesn't. He will cut the yard, when he feels like it. Then he leaves the bagged grass clippings to rot in the bags for weeks in our yard. He doesn't weed eat. He won't try to get the weeds under control. He will power wash the house when he gets to it. In the mean time we have a dirty house for months on end. I stay mad at him about all this most of the time. I don't know how to get it through his thick head that this stuff is really important to me and he needs to get it done.

If I had the money, I would hire it done. But we don't have the money. I am to the point now where I just have stopped doing alot of stuff. I do the bare minimum to get us by. I do the laundry. I cook sometimes and clean up the kitchen afterwards. I grocery shop. But I don't stay on top of it like I used to. The house right now is such a mess. This past Sunday in the car on the way home from church, I said: "Can we please take time today to get the house straightened up? I don't mean we have to spend all day cleaning. I just mean lets all spend 30 minutes to an hour cleaning up." He didn't respond. I asked: "Did you hear me?" He said "Yes." I said, "Well, don't you care how bad our house looks right now?" He agreed. But then he didn't do a damn thing towards getting it cleaned up. I cooked lunch, cleaned up after lunch, did laundry. He layed on the couch and watched TV and took a nap.

Then he wonders why in the world I am not ready to jump in bed and have hot sex with him. Duh!?!?!?!?!?!

Should I Stay or Should I Go??

Should I go to clinical this week or not? That is the question. Well, actually that was the question until I made so low on that test. Anyway, we get one absence per clinical rotation. I have not taken a day so I don't HAVE to go this Thursday. If I go, I have to be there from 7:00 a.m. until 4:30 p.m. If I don't go, I can study for my final exam which is Monday. Okay, so like I said, now that I know I made low on this last test I am not going to go to clinical. But, I feel guilty not going. Why is that????

The Test from Hell

The test we took today was a killer. I don't know where they were pulling those questions...they were so off the wall. After the test they take up the scantrons and then put the answers up on the big screen. I made a 72. That is the lowest I have made on a test yet. Alot of people failed it so I am happy I did pass. Two of the girls in my clinical group failed. We are all hoping they will give us some points back. Each time we take a test the whole group of instructors meet to review the test results and test questions. If the majority of the class miss a question, they will usually give us points back for it. So, hopefully I'll get some of those points back.

I keep checking, but so far the grades aren't posted.

Thank God for the ABC

The Atlanta Bread Company (ABC) is my new second home. My friend and I meet there and study for hours. The food is great and they don't mind us hanging out. I never learn as much when I am at home. There is too much to be done here...laundry, cleaning, kids, hubby, etc. At ABC I can keep refilling my drink and keep studying.

My house is an absolute mess. It is about to drive me crazy. I am trying to ignore it. I know I need to study, but my house needs my attention. Why don't the others who live here do something about it???? Why do they assume I will do it? Today I have washed and dried more laundry. I have piles and piles of clean laundry that need to be put away. I asked for help with this, but so far, haven't gotten any. AAAAAaaaaaaRRRRRRrrrrrHHHHHhhhhh!!!!!!!!!

Much Better

I am even better now. I still have some painful spots like around my feet and left shoulder as well as my hands. I don't know if I actually said that I had three doctors give me their opinion on what has been wrong with me. They all three agree that it is the coxsackie virus. It should eventually go away altogether. But it is taking it's sweet time. I do well as long as I don't overdo it. But, on Thursdays when I have clinical all day, I over do it. Then on Fridays I am in pain. So, I just try not to do too much when I don't have to. Sorry I have focused so much on this lately but it really scared the bee-jeezus out of me.

Clinical this week could not have been better. I picked my patient and we did preplan but we did not have to complete the entire Clinical Worksheet (CWS). The CWS takes about 7 hours to complete. So it was great that we didn't have to completely do them. We did have to do another form about communication. But that was a breeze.

My two classmates and I went in to preplan on Wednesday morning. We got a print out of all the patients on the floor from the unit secretary. We sat down and looked over that. We each picked a patient. Then we got a print out of the patient's Kardex, pull their paper chart and find a computer. It is sometimes hard to get on a computer in the mornings because that is when the doctors are there and they use them. We finally found one we could all three share. We fill in the CWS with all the patient information like name, age, gender, diagnosis, etc. We also write down all the drugs and the times they will be due during our shift. Once we have all the information we need we go in and meet the patient. My patient was great. She and her husband were very nice. I told her I would be back the next day to be her student nurse.

After that I went back home and looked up all the drugs. I filled all that information into the CWS. I looked up her diagnosis' so I know what is going on with her. On Thursday morning I got to the hospital at 6:45 a.m. I found my nurse and stayed with her. The first thing the nurses do is hear report from the night nurse. I sat in on that. It is very interesting to hear what they say about all the patients. After report I went in and took care of my patient. Once she was set, I stayed with my nurse for all her patients. She talked me through everything she was doing. It was such a great learning experience. I got to give two sub-Q injections, lots of PO meds and watched a PICC line be placed in my patient's arm. The PICC line placement was very interesting. It was done by an RN and she talked me through it. She is specialized and only does PICC lines all day. She's done it for three years and is great at it. We left the floor at 11:30 to go to a wound care in-service downstairs. It was interesting and informative. Then we went back to the lab at school and learned about trach care and suctioning.

Monday we have that big test so I'll be studying, studying, studying. Hopefully I will do well on that. I predict I'll make somewhere around an 86. That seems to be the norm for me. 86 to 88.

Getting Better

I am finally begining to feel better. I can type now with just a little pain in my hands. My joints still hurt in the morning and evening. I am finding that if I just take it easy and don't do much, I feel better. But, on those clinical days it is hell the next day. I am concerned about how long this is going to last. I am hoping it will be gone in a week or so.

About school...

I really fell behind during my being so sick. My awesome friend/classmate has really come through for me. She and I went to Atlanta Bread Company this morning. We were there from 8 a.m. til 11 a.m. She went over the notes from the classes I had missed. (We have test over this and plus lots more this Monday.) I now feel like I have a clue with the Fluid & Electrolytes chapter. Yeah!

The test on Monday is covering alot - Fluids & Electrolytes, Respiratory, Care of the Surgical Patient and Health finance. We predict it is going to be a hard test.

Clinicals are going good. I had a really cute older lady last week. She was very independent and coherent. I got to give my first injection!!!!! It was a sub-Q of Lovenox. I did good! My instructor was great. She went over the whole procedure with me before we went into the room. So, I have given meds by mouth (PO) and done an injection. Cool!

I am doing better on the weekly quizzes we are taking in lab. The past two I made an 80 and a 90. That is great considering I made a 60 on the very first one! They quiz us on the skill they will be teaching us in lab that day. Kinda weird to us that we get quizzed before they teach us. But they say it is to make sure we study before we come to class. This week the quiz will cover trach suctioning. We went over that this morning at ABC too. There are so many steps and so many things to know!!! Then the quiz will be ten questions.

On a personal note: my 8-year-old daughter had her first softball game last night. She did really well. She hit well and she got someone out on first. She looked so cute out there with all the other little girls. Her coach gave her the game ball and that just thrilled her. She has practice today.

That's it for now.

update

I am still wondering what is wrong with me. I still having a lot of pain in my joints. My mouth is healing thanks to the "Magic Mouthwash." Love it.

I have an appointment tomorrow with an internist. Friday I have an appointment with a rheumatologist. Maybe someone can figure out what is wrong with me. I am getting more and more scared.

I am trying to go on with things that I need to do. This afternoon my friend and I are going to preplan at the hospital. I hope we can get it all done so we don't have to go back.

I am missing class tomorrow in order to go to the doctor. The instructors just mainly read off the powerpoints. So, it can be quite boring sometimes. So, I'll be okay to miss that.

That is all for now.

Crazy Week

This has been the week from hell. I have never felt so much pain in my body. Every joint is screaming in pain. I could barely get out of bed or get myself ready,etc. It has been awful.

I went to my doctor's office where I saw a P.A. I saw her Tuesday and then again Friday. She doesn't know what is wrong with me. On Tuesday she did a CBC. Everything was normal. On Friday I explained to her that is is getting worse, not better. She doesn't know what is wrong with me. She tried to get me in to a rheumatoid doctor. No luck. Not til Monday. She ordered more blood tests. She gave me a sample of pain medication, Ultram ER and a prescription for Mobic an anti-inflammatory. I got it filled and came home.

My family is gone this weekend to a family reunion out of state. I am home alone. While I waited in Walmart for my prescription to be filled, I made sure to pick up fruit and healthy foods to have over the weekend. Got home, took meds. No improvement in pain after an hour. I took 800 mg IBU. That helps. Rested and went to bed early. Got up during the night and took another 800 mg IBU. Saturday morning I felt alot better. I only had slight stiffness, swelling and pain in my hands. The rest of me felt much better. I got alot done. Probably too much. I did laundry. I studied, we have a test Monday. I took a couple of naps during the day. I was optimistic that maybe it was finally going to go away.

When I woke up this morning (Sunday) I was sore all over again. Not as severe as it has been. But still, much worse than it was yesterday. During the night I had waken and taken IBU. I took it again this mornig. I am taking 800 mg every 6 hours. I hope I am not eating away my stomach or intestines. My hands are still worse than any other part of me. What in the world could be wrong with me??? I have looked alot online and can not find anything like what I am experiencing.

Tomorrow I have that test. I haven't studied near enough. Should I take the test or take an extraction from my final exam. That is a good question. I do not know the answer.

My family gets back home tonight. I hope my husband can take the kids to school tomorrow morning. I know I am not going to be in any shape to do it.

I am scared this is something very serious. I hope I get to see a rheumatoid doctor tomorrow. I hope he/she can tell me what is wrong with me and offer me a solution.